Do you know how it feels to be ALONE?
Sunday, June 1, 2008 2:00 PM
I felt bad this morning.. a lot of things was said by my mom.. about my attitude, the way I act and everything.. all in a negative comments.. Am I too mean??.. Nagpapakatotoo lang ako.. and this is me.. nothing more, nothing less.. And one thing that really depressed me, she asked if I'm ready to be alone if one day she will be in abroad again..(my gahd!) Do they really know how it feels to be alone here??.. As always they really do that to me! Most of the time I'm always here all alone in our house as if I'm getting used of it. I keep on understanding them.. they work for a living! ok fine!.. i don't have any problem with that.. When my father died everything was changed.. I came home from school with no one to talk to.. because of our four corner house was filled with emptiness... no siblings, either my mom.. :'( I really miss my dad.. things before cannot turn back the time.. and all i can say to my mom... "go ahead! leave me now as you always do!" that moment I got teary eyed.. but I don't want my mom to see me crying.. and my mom ended that discussion as if she didn't hurt my feelings.. :'(
I know i have to be independent but not at this moment.. I'm not fully recovered in my father's death.. I also felt that no one cares about me.. that they can leave me in that way.. if my mom knew how It feels to be alone here.. :'( i really feel bad today..
